Holiday Harmony: Prioritizing "We" Time for a Stronger Relationship
The holiday season is often portrayed as a time of warmth, togetherness, and joy. But for many couples, it can also be a period of stress and strain, particularly when navigating gatherings with in-laws and extended family. This year my husband and I could count seven separate Christmas celebrations that are in the calendar between mid-November to mid-December. This year we don’t have any school graduations, but there has been sports finals and end-of-year parties, school award nights and the odd birthday. The calendar can be so quickly filled with events that it can be juggling act to fit it all in.
In the midst of all the holiday activities, it's common to lose sight of what's most important – your relationship with your partner. With the added stress of managing everyday tasks, along with the extra demands of holiday preparations and the rush to finish work before the Christmas break, your relationship often takes a backseat. When both of you are busy dealing with life's challenges, it's easy to unintentionally neglect your emotional connection. In this article, we'll talk about why it's vital to make time for each other during the holidays, address common issues, offer practical advice, and discuss the benefits of doing so.
Why Prioritize "We" Time?
Before we delve into the how, let's understand the why. Why is it crucial to prioritize "we" time during the holiday season, especially when in-laws and extended family are in the picture?
The holiday season often brings unique challenges:
Increased Stress: Planning, traveling, and coordinating with family can lead to elevated stress levels, affecting both individuals and couples.
Limited Time: With a multitude of commitments, couples often find their time together diminishing, leaving them feeling disconnected.
Expectations and Pressure: Expectations from extended family can put pressure on couples, leading to conflicts and misunderstandings.
Neglecting Each Other: Amid the hustle and bustle, couples may unintentionally neglect their own needs and their connection.
Now, let's explore practical strategies for creating that vital "we" time during the holidays.
Practical Strategies for Prioritizing "We" Time:
Schedule Quality Time: Just as you would schedule family gatherings and events, intentionally schedule quality time for just the two of you. Mark it on the calendar and treat it as sacred.
Set Boundaries: Communicate with extended family and in-laws about your need for "we" time. Let them know that while you value time spent with them, you also need moments alone together. You can read more about setting boundaries at Christmas time here.
Embrace Traditions: Establish your own holiday traditions as a couple. Whether it's watching a favourite holiday movie or exchanging personal gifts, these rituals can strengthen your bond.
Practice Mindful Presence: When you are together, make an effort to be fully present. Put away distractions like phones and engage in meaningful conversations.
Delegate Responsibilities: Share responsibilities with your partner, both in planning and executing holiday activities. This reduces stress and allows for more "we" time.
The Benefits of Prioritizing "We" Time:
Now that we've discussed why and how to prioritize "we" time, let's explore the benefits couples can reap from this conscious effort:
Enhanced Connection: "We" time fosters a deeper emotional connection between partners, reaffirming their bond.
Stress Reduction: Spending quality time together can reduce stress levels, helping both partners navigate the demands of the season more effectively.
Conflict Prevention: "We" time allows for open communication, reducing the likelihood of misunderstandings and conflicts.
Quality Over Quantity: It's not about the quantity of time spent together but the quality. Even short, meaningful moments can have a significant impact.
Creating Lasting Memories: "We" time creates cherished memories that couples can look back on with fondness, reinforcing their commitment.
To wrap up, amidst the hustle and bustle of the holiday season, it's easy to neglect your relationship in favour of family commitments. However, prioritizing "we" time is essential for nurturing your connection and maintaining a healthy partnership. By scheduling quality time, setting boundaries, embracing traditions, practicing mindful presence, and sharing responsibilities, you can create moments of togetherness that will strengthen your bond. The benefits are numerous, from enhanced connection and stress reduction to conflict prevention and the creation of lasting memories.
This holiday season, remember that your relationship deserves as much care and attention as any other aspect of your life.
Carrie x
PS. I’ve created a handout to help you brainstorm ‘we’ time ideas. Click here to download